Have you ever had a hot blind date? Now, you know why they call it "blind" date. Sure, you'll go on TV on a blind date because you have the whole crew of guys to scout while on date:) Blind dates should be call a step closer to taking Oleander drink (poison). As your thoughts of prince charming flee as fast as superman, your married friend calls. Ring. "Hi, single friend. What are you doing Saturday night," says married friend in sneaky manner. "Nothing," you single person say as
silly to go to bar by single self. "Great, I have a friend I'd like you to meet. I think you'll hit it off." shark married says like gold circle salesman. "
Uhhhh, I
uhhhh." single friend says caught off guard. "Jethro will pick you up at 8." Whoosh. Married person has vanished. I have mouth
wide open. Nerves start to wake up ready to spring into action. Stomach gets that funny feeling. I buy new
Prada dress
in case in could be Mr. Right. My married
friend is happily ever with handsome business guy. Door bell rings and there he is. Mr. Oh My God! I wish I were sipping my Oleander tea right now. Thoughts of, I can't believe I spent $500.00 on dress with Dr.
Jekyll minus no hair. At dinner at place I never heard of, conversation is stale as the bread. Cheap jokes are
cheaper than the wine. I barely drink as I need all my
wits to plan escape to hunt my married friend down. So, I am polite as this is my "friends" husbands friend. I am stuck like peanut butter on bread. I have to answer check list questions as if being
interrogated by Single Police. What do you do? How come you never married? Don't you want kids? What happened in your last relationship.....I take a
swallow of cheap wine and cough. Cough. Cough. I vein mysterious illness and must rush home. I locked doors and open bottle of good wine. My only friend. Trollop girls help me avoid blind dates fixed by evil married friends.
Dear Singleton:
Their is only one question to ask when you are being set up.
Question: Would you (married) sleep with blind date?
If they nudge, think, mumble instantly say: "My Mom's birthday is that weekend. Shame. Such as shame."
Tisley Trollop
Single And Loving It!
